Crew Juice

Stu travels the world far and wide

With a bottle of crew juice by his side

Never lets a glass go completely dry

Fills it to the rim every time

Then he met a girl who he tried to befriend

Who missed her Chicago so got 9 sheets to the wind

“Here have some,” he said - “Sure, what’s in it?”

“I can tell you quick, in just under a minute.”

Cranberry and orange juice, that’s part’s so easy

The rest of the mix is what makes it so pleasing

Three parts rum and Grand Marinier in two

Two parts Disorono just for you

Serve it well chilled and over some ice

Makes debriefings go well- all warm and all nice

She then emptied a glass just like that

And got so drunk as if she drank a whole vat

 

Then that old Stu with his devious charm

Sent her over to me and I yelled out, “Oh, Darn!”

This drunk girl with her sloppy-slurred speech

She’s stuck onto me like a blood-sucking leech

I’ve got to escape this- my sanity to save

And have another glass of that crew juice you made!